Life Is Still Beautiful...

Photo Credit: My Hubby

 Hi!

So, here we are.

The drunken toddlers are in charge of one of the most powerful countries in the world. I can't help but wonder what historians will make of this in 50 years. How it will be examined by scholars, students, anthropologists, writers, and psychologists. Maybe they will better be able to piece together how we got here from further away. 

It will likely baffle all of them for a long while.

But.....

We can't remain in the doom and gloom of it. I know I can't. The sometimes obnoxiously perpetual optimist that I am won't allow it. It's happening, now we just have to be vigilant, and do our best.

Kindness and empathy will eventually get the upper hand. Karma didn't retire, she'll show up and strike when the time is right. 

In the meantime...

Whatever we choose to feed tends to be what flourishes. I'm making a conscious choice to feed light. Feeding the dark can do nothing but bring misery. Personally, misery is not the place where I want to reside.

Most of what happens in this world does so without our permission. All we can do is accept that, roll with it, do our best to stay true to who we are, and continue to stand up for those who need it most. 

This, by no means we roll over and play dead. It doesn't mean we decimate boundaries. It just means we live our lives grabbing joy, matching every ounce of the enthusiasm your dog greets you with after a long day. 

The choices people have made will come home to roost soon enough. We just have to do what we can to redirect the shrapnel of those choices so they don't hit innocent bystanders. 

So, keep being your fabulous selves. Keep dancing. Keep cooking. Keep celebrating. Leave misery to those who picked it. 

Let them.

They picked it. Let them own it. They won't need our help. It will happen because they choose misery, hate, and anger at every turn. Don't allow yourself to get swallowed into their dark pit. Don't allow them to steal your joy, at least not for too long.

Life is still beautiful. We may just have to work a little harder to see that for a while.

Create your joy. Run a tub full of it and soak. 

Congratulations...

 Hi!

Over the past few days, I've been struggling. 

Struggling to make sense of what is happening.

Struggling to hang on to positivity.

Struggling, as I am finding out that a huge chunk of those who voted for Captain Shitshispants did so out some fantasy that they think he stands for. Completely and utterly unaware of what his plans are for them.

I guess there was a reason that during his speeches he kept talking about windmills, Hannibal Lecter, and gave blow jobs to microphones. The 'look the other way' strategy, whether intentional, or just another symptom of his dementia, worked.

They have absolutely no idea what they voted for, and now they are going to, if they are very lucky, have ONLY four years of living with the consequences of their choices. My heart breaks for those who will be collateral damage. 

To those who chose Captain Asshat...

There is a difference...

With her, we would have proven you wrong.

With him, you'll prove us right.

The biggest difference being the amount of people who get hurt, or worse, in the process. 

There are already little girls in elementary schools being pushed around by boys yelling, repeating, taunting with "your body MY choice!"

There are already texts going out to black students in colleges and high schools telling them they should prepare to report to some kind of slavery coalition and that they will be assigned to plantations.

There are still two months until he actually takes office. Do you think this kind of crap ISN'T going to amplify when he actually takes his seat in the Oval?

You thought it was crazy last time. 

Buckle up.

Now the guardrails are gone. You know, the guardrails that were adults, generals, serious, experienced people who understood the gravity of the job. You know, the guardrails that worked the closest to him and got to know him best. You know, the guardrails that warned against voting for him, that explained over and over again why and just how dangerous he is. 

Now his cherry-picked Supreme Court has given him immunity on anything he does while in office.

Now that your opportunity to ever vote again is not guaranteed.

Now that every woman and girl no longer has control of what happens to her body.

They think he cares about them. Still. If it wasn't so sad and terrifying it would be funny, the level of delusion these people live under.

One young lady was interviewed as she came out of the voting station. She was with her boyfriend. Asked who she voted for, she said "trump,' as she looked to her boyfriend beside her. When asked why, her reply was "he said he wouldn't ban abortion." At this, her boyfriend couldn't help but snicker, she looked over at him with a shocked confused look. The reporter walked away.

Many voted because of the tariffs. Now they are finding out in real time that it means not at all what they have been lead to believe. 

People...

Research... actual research... requires more of you than just watching anecdotal videos, and listening to podcasts with only one point of view.

It requires looking into public records on how your candidates vote. 

It requires digging into how they have walked through life, thus far. 

It requires looking into past actions, who they speak up for, and who they speak up against.

The way you conduct your life, the way you treat people along the way, the way you make your living, speaks to the core of who you are as a human.

Find out who and what you are voting for before you vote. Don't just take in what they are telling you during the campaign, while they are trying to win you over. Don't listen to the ads. Dig. Don't listen to the insults. Dig. 

Don't be the person thinking you are voting for cheaper eggs and get your Christmas bonus revoked due to your boss needing to stock up on product because of the tariffs he knows are coming. 

Don't be the person that is now finding yourself in panicked parent groups because he plans on gutting public education, and the programs that you benefit from through the school for free, are going to go away and you can't afford to pay out of pocket. 

Don't be the person who lives on disability, or relies on medicare, or has pre-existing conditions, or lives month to month on social security, that is going to soon find out just what the "pull yourself up by your bootstraps" crowd really means by that. 

Don't be the person who works for minimum wage, thinking gas is just too expensive, that now has to take a cut in pay because the minimum limit ceases to exist. 

Don't think that, as an immigrant, you are safe because you aren't one of the "bad" ones he was talking about, only to find out that last time he had the power, thousands of people exactly like you were booted without cause. 

Don't be the person who votes for policies that will put your neighbours, your friends, your family, or anyone in actual, physical danger. 

But here we are.

A Putin fangirl, adjudicated rapist, misogynist, racist, fascist, queerphobic, dementia-riddled, fraudulent, bankrupted, 34-count convicted, bigoted felon has been elevated to the highest office in the world... again. 

The consequences of your choices are going to be felt the world over, and will have generational repercussions.

Congratulations. 

We are already hearing the echoes of "But I didn't know..." That is a bullshit copout. If you didn't know it was your conscious choice not to find out. You watch a few tiktoks and youtube videos that algorithms push in front of you and watch news that only speaks to one point of view and call it "research."

Bullshit. Do the work. Public records are just that. Public. Look up how they vote. Look up how they live their life. Use google for more than to look up porn. 

You don't get drunk, drive, kill someone and then plead that you didn't know it would happen so it's not your fault.

You voted for whatever comes down the pike. All of it. Now you get to own all of it. You don't get the luxury of hiding behind the fact that you can't accurately separate fact from fantasy. 

Nope.

The first time, you wanted to give him a chance. You wanted all of us to give him a chance, and he put children in cages and told the world that injecting cleanser would cure covid.

This time you know. And you did it anyway.

Now you get to own the consequences. 

Congratulations. 

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Aaaaand The Days Get Shorter....

 

Hi!

Well, goodbye October!

October has been filled with beautiful skies, and warmer-than-normal weather, ending with a fun Halloween that included singing for some very sweet elderly people, then rushing home to scare some kids and their parents just enough to make them squeal a bit, and maybe pee a little... aaaand give away a bunch of candy. 

November is going to be a banner month... I can feel it in my bones. Big changes are in the air... good ones, maybe even great ones. 

The Holiday season is starting to enter conversations, sometimes because it feels like we are forced to because of retail ads and decorations. Back-to-school, Halloween, and the Holidays seem to happen within the span of a week. 

Time flies fast enough, give us a minute to savour it, would ya?

Give yourself permission to take a breath. You're allowed to live life at your own pace... at least for the most part. 

As the days shorten, and the nights gain power, optimism is a virtue that becomes a bit tenuous for many. Because of this, it becomes even more important to celebrate every joy. Soaking in every light possible. keeping connected to family and friends, creating things to look forward to... these all help keep the dark outside where it belongs. 

I don't imagine there is any scientific proof of this, but I have a theory. I think those of us who struggle with the dwindling of daylight are the same ones who like to decorate for the Holidays early. It's a coping tool, whether it's a conscious one or not is another thing. 

Anyway...

There are two months left in this year, 2024. 

Let's make them count, shall we?

Let's make them memorable.

Let's make them joyous.

Let's make them shine. 

Words Matter...

Hi!

Words matter.

Certain words float around in the ether that are culturally, morally, societally, and universally understood as offensive, as hurtful, as just plain wrong.

Now, before you get your panties in a twist, I am not talking about your run-of-the-mill swear words or religious-type words that make my mom cringe. 

No, I'm talking about the racially and culturally charged ones that hit the ear with the force of a baseball bat swinging for the fences and reverberate through to your soul. Back in the day, it was easier to feign ignorance. That excuse no longer works... at all. With access to unlimited information, there isn't a person in the free world that should be confused.

If these words, and the attitudes you use to justify their use, flow from you with, or without hesitation, that's a choice. You know it's wrong, you know it's racist... you know... you simply choose to do it anyway.

If these words are coming from children and teenagers you are charged with raising, they learned it from you. 

Just keep this in mind. The world at large, the one you are sending them into, ceased to accept or tolerate these words or attitudes decades ago.

When you know better, you do better. 

You can't pretend you don't know better. Not. Any. More. 

Save the clutching of the pearls when what you say offends others. Save the scoffing like people are just being over-sensitive. Just save it.

Intentional and continued pretense of ignorance tells all of us who you are.

It speaks to your core character.

It speaks to how you see the world and how see yourself fitring in it.

It speaks to how you see anyone who lives outside of the tiny boxes you feel comfortable with. 

If you are still confused.

Words like that are NEVER ok. There is not a circumstance that exists in which it becomes even almost, remotely okay. Not in a joke. Not in a song. Not in reference. Just no. 

There aren't that many words that fall under this category. 

It's not that freakin' hard. If you find it difficult, maybe it's time for some deep introspection.  

Strip away the pretenses and excuses you give others and yourself, and dig into the real "why" behind your belief system. Behind your attitude. Behind your words. 

It has been my experience that if someone is willing to let racial slurs fly, then homophobic, body shaming, differently-abled ridiculing, and others, spew just as easily. 

In using these slurs, what is the goal?

If it's to present yourself to the world as a backward-thinking bigot, congratulations. Mission accomplished. 

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Good Times Are Coming...

 

Hi!

Sometimes life is just hard. 

Full stop.

At times, it can feel like a darkness trying to swallow you whole. The only news you seem to be getting is bad news. The little things that go wrong begin to stack up, adding to the big stresses that are being dumped on your doorstep. You begin to feel destabilized, shaky, like the next thing regardless of how small, just might be the last thing you can handle without collapsing under the weight. 

These phases of life seem to happen to some people more than others. there doesn't seem to be rhyme nor reason. They happen regardless of how kind, how cruel, how accepting, how bigoted, how powerful, how absolutely average you are. But, as far as the stick of life goes, some definitely get handed the shitty end more than others. 

I'm not sure if that helps prove, disprove, or changes in any way, the concepts of karma, universal fate, or whatever, but these are my thoughts on the subject...

I think that everything that comes to us while we walk this earth is brought to us to teach us something about ourselves we have yet to learn, and need to know. Easy times can teach us just as much as hard ones. We find out if good fortune makes us more or less greedy. We find out if hard times make us bitter. We find out if, when things are going swimmingly, we remain grateful, or begin to feel entitled. We find out if, when things are moving along like a tornado within a hurricane on top of an earthquake, we can remain grateful, or do we surrender our joy. 

When things are going great, enjoy it! Celebrate it! Bathe in it! Soak it in! These are the times that fortify us for when things get tough. These are the memories we draw from in times of grief or loss of any kind, really. 

When things are going great, it's easy to start taking things for granted. It's easy to slip into a mindset that somehow we deserve nothing but good times, that we must be, in some way, just a little bit better than those whose lives don't sail along without a storm in site. Then, when something dark inevitably creeps from the shadows, we feel "why me" syndrome take hold. 

It takes hold, we aren't perfect. Of course it does. We just can't allow ourselves to lay down a foundation and build our life there, regardless of how seductive and easy that feels. Why me? Why not me is a much better question. 

When things get dark, although it can be a struggle, we are only human after all, it becomes more important than ever to hang on to every glimmer of light we can find, no matter how faint, how small. Sometimes, it's wearing super cute hats on chemo day, and all the days in between. Sometimes it's hanging out with those that matter to you most, simply catching up. Sometimes it's cranking music and dancing with the confidence of a sugar-buzzed toddler. Sometimes it's watching funny dog videos and old movies that you know make you laugh. Sometimes it's allowing yourself room to cry it out, cleansing the soul. 

If the glimmers elude you, please reach out. Someone will help bridge the gap between the grips and the grace. They may not do it perfectly, with the perfect words, but they can connect you to a space bigger than the weight of your stress, creating room to breathe. 

Find the little things, and hold them tight, good times are coming... 

Please Take Care...

 

Hi!

It's incredible to think that as a person takes these serene, whimsical, pretty autumn photos, a once-in-a-lifetime, crazy hurricane is making its way toward land, possessions, and fellow humans.

It's only been a couple of weeks since the last devastating hurricane carved its path through some gorgeous places that are vulnerable to these kinds of storms and the wrecking-ball aftermath that follows.

It baffles the mind to think that some are choosing to stay in its wake. They seem do this for various reasons. They don't believe it will be that bad, they are striving for clout on social media, and/or they think that somehow their presence will, in some way, save their property. You throw in a dose of conspiracy theories espousing people of a certain faith and political background are, somehow, magically, garnering the power needed to manipulate entire weather patterns, and I guess it explains at least part of the mystery of what keeps them there. 

Yes, where I live, the temperatures can drop to dangerous depths for at least a quarter of the year.

Yes, where I live, the temperatures can rise to dangerous heights for about six weeks out of the year.

Yes, we have devastating droughts.

Yes, we have devastating hail/thunderstorms and winds with the odd tornado thrown in for good measure, that on their own or in combination, have the power to level entire crops. 

But...

We don't have shattering earthquakes, or hurricanes. At least not yet. The way the weather patterns are ramping up, changing, and shifting, I imagine it's only a matter of time. I doubt it will be my lifetime, but, hey, who knows? 

My hope of hopes is that this storm won't be as horrible as the meteorologists are predicting, and that no one gets hurt because they stayed. Sadly, the reality will likely not reflect those wishes.

Mother Nature has a way of flexing her power whenever the mood suits her. We measly humans are but spectators. We can do what we can to protect ourselves, evacuate, shelter in place, the best thing... follow local emergency authorities' instructions. 

We, as a human race get caught up in ourselves, our egos, our agendas. Some go out of their way to make life miserable for others. Some go out of their way to make life inclusive, and safe for others. Some ignore all of it. 

Mother nature cares not what your belief system entails, whether or not you belong to an organized religion, the colour of your skin, or who you love. She flexes equally across the board, without mercy. 

For those in this monster's path, please stay as safe as possible. For those of us who live beyond its devastation, let's just do whatever we can to help. 

Please take care. 

But Were They Though???...

 

Hi!

I don't know about you, but I hear quite often how people are missing the so-called good old days. They are nostalgic for a rose-coloured image from a rearview mirror that distorts the perception into some romanticized version of the past. 

Most of the people I hear this from are included in a specific demographic. Privilege. 

If, in the past you, weren't allowed to buy a house, or rent one, for that matter, get a credit card, have a bank account, dress the way you like, love who you love, marry who you want to marry, felt that your biology didn't match your soul, or had a complexion other than translucent, chances are, you have zero desire to travel back in time. 

Personally, with every step of acceptance, with every move toward inclusivity, as generationally, the human race becomes less mayo-esque in hue, I find myself feeling more and more at peace with the world. 

There are certain parcels of people who want to shove people back into the closets they were forced to hide in. Trying to claim that the whole of the LBGTQ+ community are, somehow, newcomers to society.

If you look back far enough you will find that centuries ago, our rainbow warriors were revered as the rare and beautiful unicorns they are. It was a subtle shift in society, slowly, as men stopped wearing tights and wigs and society came to believe that "others" needed to be owned, suppressed, hidden, and/or simply destroyed, that treatment of those who no longer fit in these ever-tightening societal 'norms' went completely off the rails. 

As organized religions became more powerful, seizing ownership of everyone's moral compass, claiming the "my beliefs are correct and the rest of you are damned" mentality, they began to make their own rules, turning their religious beliefs into laws for all. 

Now, the religions with the wealthiest members, 99.9% white, of course, made the most rules, colonizing, forcing themselves both literally and metaphorically upon fellow humans, wherever their money took them. They stole children under the guise of salvation, they imprisoned, they enslaved, they abused, whip in one hand and a bible in the other. 

Then, in very recent history, new generations began to recognize the poison. and started to push for change. Civil unrest became the instrument, the antidote, to make it possible. Young people who were willing to push against the antiquated thinking of their parents and grandparents, changed the world. 

Progress became tangible. 

This was the trend... for a while.

No there aren't all of a sudden way more rainbow warriors, people of colour, or more of any group some would like to label as "other" than there ever were. 

The only thing that changed is the migration from the dark corner of collective closets into the sun.

The only thing that changed is the fact that rights for equality were just beginning to take a small hold.

The only thing that changed is that women are done asking for equality and are beginning to demand it.

There aren't more, just more visible.

Then, those who have held all of the power for far too long began to feel threatened by the changes they began to see. And the "otherizing" began once again.

Once again, rainbow warriors became targets of hate, along with anyone who didn't fit in their white, tiny boxes of "normal."

Once again, women's bodily autonomy was pulled back.

Once again, people of certain colours or religions are experiencing overt and blatant prejudice.

If you find yourself feeling nostalgic for yesteryear, thinking that times were simpler, times were easier, times were better... were they, though?

Well, maybe they were for you, but not for everyone. 

Let go of a past that contains way more darkness than our history books would lead us to believe. Accept the fact that white people, who are the ones who wrote the history books by the way, were much more often the villain, especially during the last few centuries, than they ever were the hero.

Looking ahead, now that we know better, we have every opportunity to do better. 

We owe it to those who come after us to do just that.

Vote for the changes to create a society your great-grandbabies, the great-grandbabies of those you care for, and all future generations can thrive in, and will be able to look back on with pride. 

All we can do, with our short time on this planet, is try to steer society in a direction our descendants will be able to study and see we did our part to do right by every human. 

Let's do everything we can so that when they look back, they don't have to be ashamed of the actions of their ancestors the way we are. 

Let's do this. 

We are not doomed to repeat the shameful mistakes of those who came before us. We simply have to choose not to. 

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