Aaaaand The Days Get Shorter....

 

Hi!

Well, goodbye October!

October has been filled with beautiful skies, and warmer-than-normal weather, ending with a fun Halloween that included singing for some very sweet elderly people, then rushing home to scare some kids and their parents just enough to make them squeal a bit, and maybe pee a little... aaaand give away a bunch of candy. 

November is going to be a banner month... I can feel it in my bones. Big changes are in the air... good ones, maybe even great ones. 

The Holiday season is starting to enter conversations, sometimes because it feels like we are forced to because of retail ads and decorations. Back-to-school, Halloween, and the Holidays seem to happen within the span of a week. 

Time flies fast enough, give us a minute to savour it, would ya?

Give yourself permission to take a breath. You're allowed to live life at your own pace... at least for the most part. 

As the days shorten, and the nights gain power, optimism is a virtue that becomes a bit tenuous for many. Because of this, it becomes even more important to celebrate every joy. Soaking in every light possible. keeping connected to family and friends, creating things to look forward to... these all help keep the dark outside where it belongs. 

I don't imagine there is any scientific proof of this, but I have a theory. I think those of us who struggle with the dwindling of daylight are the same ones who like to decorate for the Holidays early. It's a coping tool, whether it's a conscious one or not is another thing. 

Anyway...

There are two months left in this year, 2024. 

Let's make them count, shall we?

Let's make them memorable.

Let's make them joyous.

Let's make them shine. 

Words Matter...

Hi!

Words matter.

Certain words float around in the ether that are culturally, morally, societally, and universally understood as offensive, as hurtful, as just plain wrong.

Now, before you get your panties in a twist, I am not talking about your run-of-the-mill swear words or religious-type words that make my mom cringe. 

No, I'm talking about the racially and culturally charged ones that hit the ear with the force of a baseball bat swinging for the fences and reverberate through to your soul. Back in the day, it was easier to feign ignorance. That excuse no longer works... at all. With access to unlimited information, there isn't a person in the free world that should be confused.

If these words, and the attitudes you use to justify their use, flow from you with, or without hesitation, that's a choice. You know it's wrong, you know it's racist... you know... you simply choose to do it anyway.

If these words are coming from children and teenagers you are charged with raising, they learned it from you. 

Just keep this in mind. The world at large, the one you are sending them into, ceased to accept or tolerate these words or attitudes decades ago.

When you know better, you do better. 

You can't pretend you don't know better. Not. Any. More. 

Save the clutching of the pearls when what you say offends others. Save the scoffing like people are just being over-sensitive. Just save it.

Intentional and continued pretense of ignorance tells all of us who you are.

It speaks to your core character.

It speaks to how you see the world and how see yourself fitring in it.

It speaks to how you see anyone who lives outside of the tiny boxes you feel comfortable with. 

If you are still confused.

Words like that are NEVER ok. There is not a circumstance that exists in which it becomes even almost, remotely okay. Not in a joke. Not in a song. Not in reference. Just no. 

There aren't that many words that fall under this category. 

It's not that freakin' hard. If you find it difficult, maybe it's time for some deep introspection.  

Strip away the pretenses and excuses you give others and yourself, and dig into the real "why" behind your belief system. Behind your attitude. Behind your words. 

It has been my experience that if someone is willing to let racial slurs fly, then homophobic, body shaming, differently-abled ridiculing, and others, spew just as easily. 

In using these slurs, what is the goal?

If it's to present yourself to the world as a backward-thinking bigot, congratulations. Mission accomplished. 

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Good Times Are Coming...

 

Hi!

Sometimes life is just hard. 

Full stop.

At times, it can feel like a darkness trying to swallow you whole. The only news you seem to be getting is bad news. The little things that go wrong begin to stack up, adding to the big stresses that are being dumped on your doorstep. You begin to feel destabilized, shaky, like the next thing regardless of how small, just might be the last thing you can handle without collapsing under the weight. 

These phases of life seem to happen to some people more than others. there doesn't seem to be rhyme nor reason. They happen regardless of how kind, how cruel, how accepting, how bigoted, how powerful, how absolutely average you are. But, as far as the stick of life goes, some definitely get handed the shitty end more than others. 

I'm not sure if that helps prove, disprove, or changes in any way, the concepts of karma, universal fate, or whatever, but these are my thoughts on the subject...

I think that everything that comes to us while we walk this earth is brought to us to teach us something about ourselves we have yet to learn, and need to know. Easy times can teach us just as much as hard ones. We find out if good fortune makes us more or less greedy. We find out if hard times make us bitter. We find out if, when things are going swimmingly, we remain grateful, or begin to feel entitled. We find out if, when things are moving along like a tornado within a hurricane on top of an earthquake, we can remain grateful, or do we surrender our joy. 

When things are going great, enjoy it! Celebrate it! Bathe in it! Soak it in! These are the times that fortify us for when things get tough. These are the memories we draw from in times of grief or loss of any kind, really. 

When things are going great, it's easy to start taking things for granted. It's easy to slip into a mindset that somehow we deserve nothing but good times, that we must be, in some way, just a little bit better than those whose lives don't sail along without a storm in site. Then, when something dark inevitably creeps from the shadows, we feel "why me" syndrome take hold. 

It takes hold, we aren't perfect. Of course it does. We just can't allow ourselves to lay down a foundation and build our life there, regardless of how seductive and easy that feels. Why me? Why not me is a much better question. 

When things get dark, although it can be a struggle, we are only human after all, it becomes more important than ever to hang on to every glimmer of light we can find, no matter how faint, how small. Sometimes, it's wearing super cute hats on chemo day, and all the days in between. Sometimes it's hanging out with those that matter to you most, simply catching up. Sometimes it's cranking music and dancing with the confidence of a sugar-buzzed toddler. Sometimes it's watching funny dog videos and old movies that you know make you laugh. Sometimes it's allowing yourself room to cry it out, cleansing the soul. 

If the glimmers elude you, please reach out. Someone will help bridge the gap between the grips and the grace. They may not do it perfectly, with the perfect words, but they can connect you to a space bigger than the weight of your stress, creating room to breathe. 

Find the little things, and hold them tight, good times are coming... 

Please Take Care...

 

Hi!

It's incredible to think that as a person takes these serene, whimsical, pretty autumn photos, a once-in-a-lifetime, crazy hurricane is making its way toward land, possessions, and fellow humans.

It's only been a couple of weeks since the last devastating hurricane carved its path through some gorgeous places that are vulnerable to these kinds of storms and the wrecking-ball aftermath that follows.

It baffles the mind to think that some are choosing to stay in its wake. They seem do this for various reasons. They don't believe it will be that bad, they are striving for clout on social media, and/or they think that somehow their presence will, in some way, save their property. You throw in a dose of conspiracy theories espousing people of a certain faith and political background are, somehow, magically, garnering the power needed to manipulate entire weather patterns, and I guess it explains at least part of the mystery of what keeps them there. 

Yes, where I live, the temperatures can drop to dangerous depths for at least a quarter of the year.

Yes, where I live, the temperatures can rise to dangerous heights for about six weeks out of the year.

Yes, we have devastating droughts.

Yes, we have devastating hail/thunderstorms and winds with the odd tornado thrown in for good measure, that on their own or in combination, have the power to level entire crops. 

But...

We don't have shattering earthquakes, or hurricanes. At least not yet. The way the weather patterns are ramping up, changing, and shifting, I imagine it's only a matter of time. I doubt it will be my lifetime, but, hey, who knows? 

My hope of hopes is that this storm won't be as horrible as the meteorologists are predicting, and that no one gets hurt because they stayed. Sadly, the reality will likely not reflect those wishes.

Mother Nature has a way of flexing her power whenever the mood suits her. We measly humans are but spectators. We can do what we can to protect ourselves, evacuate, shelter in place, the best thing... follow local emergency authorities' instructions. 

We, as a human race get caught up in ourselves, our egos, our agendas. Some go out of their way to make life miserable for others. Some go out of their way to make life inclusive, and safe for others. Some ignore all of it. 

Mother nature cares not what your belief system entails, whether or not you belong to an organized religion, the colour of your skin, or who you love. She flexes equally across the board, without mercy. 

For those in this monster's path, please stay as safe as possible. For those of us who live beyond its devastation, let's just do whatever we can to help. 

Please take care. 

But Were They Though???...

 

Hi!

I don't know about you, but I hear quite often how people are missing the so-called good old days. They are nostalgic for a rose-coloured image from a rearview mirror that distorts the perception into some romanticized version of the past. 

Most of the people I hear this from are included in a specific demographic. Privilege. 

If, in the past you, weren't allowed to buy a house, or rent one, for that matter, get a credit card, have a bank account, dress the way you like, love who you love, marry who you want to marry, felt that your biology didn't match your soul, or had a complexion other than translucent, chances are, you have zero desire to travel back in time. 

Personally, with every step of acceptance, with every move toward inclusivity, as generationally, the human race becomes less mayo-esque in hue, I find myself feeling more and more at peace with the world. 

There are certain parcels of people who want to shove people back into the closets they were forced to hide in. Trying to claim that the whole of the LBGTQ+ community are, somehow, newcomers to society.

If you look back far enough you will find that centuries ago, our rainbow warriors were revered as the rare and beautiful unicorns they are. It was a subtle shift in society, slowly, as men stopped wearing tights and wigs and society came to believe that "others" needed to be owned, suppressed, hidden, and/or simply destroyed, that treatment of those who no longer fit in these ever-tightening societal 'norms' went completely off the rails. 

As organized religions became more powerful, seizing ownership of everyone's moral compass, claiming the "my beliefs are correct and the rest of you are damned" mentality, they began to make their own rules, turning their religious beliefs into laws for all. 

Now, the religions with the wealthiest members, 99.9% white, of course, made the most rules, colonizing, forcing themselves both literally and metaphorically upon fellow humans, wherever their money took them. They stole children under the guise of salvation, they imprisoned, they enslaved, they abused, whip in one hand and a bible in the other. 

Then, in very recent history, new generations began to recognize the poison. and started to push for change. Civil unrest became the instrument, the antidote, to make it possible. Young people who were willing to push against the antiquated thinking of their parents and grandparents, changed the world. 

Progress became tangible. 

This was the trend... for a while.

No there aren't all of a sudden way more rainbow warriors, people of colour, or more of any group some would like to label as "other" than there ever were. 

The only thing that changed is the migration from the dark corner of collective closets into the sun.

The only thing that changed is the fact that rights for equality were just beginning to take a small hold.

The only thing that changed is that women are done asking for equality and are beginning to demand it.

There aren't more, just more visible.

Then, those who have held all of the power for far too long began to feel threatened by the changes they began to see. And the "otherizing" began once again.

Once again, rainbow warriors became targets of hate, along with anyone who didn't fit in their white, tiny boxes of "normal."

Once again, women's bodily autonomy was pulled back.

Once again, people of certain colours or religions are experiencing overt and blatant prejudice.

If you find yourself feeling nostalgic for yesteryear, thinking that times were simpler, times were easier, times were better... were they, though?

Well, maybe they were for you, but not for everyone. 

Let go of a past that contains way more darkness than our history books would lead us to believe. Accept the fact that white people, who are the ones who wrote the history books by the way, were much more often the villain, especially during the last few centuries, than they ever were the hero.

Looking ahead, now that we know better, we have every opportunity to do better. 

We owe it to those who come after us to do just that.

Vote for the changes to create a society your great-grandbabies, the great-grandbabies of those you care for, and all future generations can thrive in, and will be able to look back on with pride. 

All we can do, with our short time on this planet, is try to steer society in a direction our descendants will be able to study and see we did our part to do right by every human. 

Let's do everything we can so that when they look back, they don't have to be ashamed of the actions of their ancestors the way we are. 

Let's do this. 

We are not doomed to repeat the shameful mistakes of those who came before us. We simply have to choose not to. 

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38 Days and Counting...

 Hi!

In about 38 days our neighbours to the south will be making a decision that will have a global impact.

Yes, I'm Canadian, and proud to be.

Many of the negative messages I get come at that fact with a certain vitriol that I don't understand. I am very aware that I don't live in your country. That is not an accident. But living outside of your borders doesn't make us immune to your choices.

If our southern neighbours choose to again put this failed, willfully ignorant, old, racist, homophobic, misogynistic, narcissistic, feeble-minded, bloated, orange, adjudicated rapist, convicted felon in the Whitehouse, it will have an impact on us all. 

The poison that he and his bum-dwellers spew spreads, infecting everything it touches as you would expect of any venom. The permission it gives to racists and other backwards thinking mouth-breathers to inflict violence and other cruelties upon any and all that don't fit their shiny, white boxes has been, and continues to be, palpable. 

The Russian cheerleaders that can't seem to grasp the fact that allowing the vengeful, bald bully that steals their "elections" every goddamn time, to get his way, in regards to Ukraine, will have absolutely no reason to stop there. The bloated cheeto will simply step aside and allow it to happen. Why? Because he is a dictator-worshipping wannabe.

Why do you think he said in a speech, during this campaign cycle, on camera, in front of hearing people, that if you just vote for him this one, last time, you won't ever need to vote again?!

His babysitters try to pass it off as a joke, like they always do, each and every time he says something that gives away their project 2025 agenda too bluntly. In other words, when he brings the darkest parts of the map to Gilead into the light. 

Have you ever looked at the faces of the littles, including his own grandkids, when he is touching, holding and kissing them? All without their consent, by the way. And yes, children are allowed to say no to all of that. They look, at the least, uncomfortable as hell, at the most, frickin' terrified. They look how the majority of women collectively felt when he said the other day that he will be our "protector." I think he forgot how to pronounce predator. I know when I heard the words come from his mouth, my body had a visceral, involuntary reaction of hair standing on end, sweating, and a barbed-wire knot forming in my stomach. 

If we, as a world citizenry, allow these right-wing conspiracy-loving, fact-retardant asshats, to bully their way into running the planet, we will very likely cease to have one before our bloodlines run cold. The level of science denial is mind-boggling. 

I know some who just want to not engage. Just not vote. Every person who refrains from voting, knowing full well what is at risk, is guilty of giving those who want to drag us backward, the permission to do just that. 

Some say the reason they don't want to vote is because they don't have enough information. So, get it. Inform yourself so you can make an informed decision. 

In lieu of putting in the effort needed for that... simply pay attention. Unless you are living under a rock, it's pretty easy to determine the direction each political party is headed. Which direction is most cohesive with your values? Do you want your kids and grandkids to have the ability to make any and all decisions about what happens or does not happen to their bodies? Do you want your gay grandchildren to be able to get married and be parents someday, if they so choose? Do you want your child to be able to safely grow up without having to hide who they are? Do you want them to not have to endure the trauma of shooter drills and, god forbid, the reason there ARE shooter drills?

Our southern neighbours, the world is counting on you. And that is not an exaggeration. It is not hyperbole. We are obligated, as citizens of the earth, to protect her and ALL those who walk upon her. We need to collectively stand up to bullies who want to turn the already huge gap between the haves and have-nots into an unbridgeable chasm that creates such an advantage over the labouring class, we will soon find ourselves living in a society that has accepted what will become akin to borderline slavery.

They look to strip us of unions, and safety nets. They want to keep wages down, profits repugnantly high, housing costs beyond what one job can pay for, keeping the workforce exhausted and defeated. All this as they tower over us, watching us fighting to keep our heads above water. They watch from a safe distance, as to not get too close to the sweat, through diamond-encrusted binoculars, sipping Dom, lounging on the upper decks of their mega-yachts... laughing, knowing they could have been stopped, if we had only chosen to do so. 

Vote. 

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Unforced Tragedy... There's No Reason

 

Hi,

Why?

Why is a six-year-old little boy having to deal with the unnecessary, unforced tragedy of losing his Mommy at the hands of the backward-thinking, barbaric, asshats that deem themselves experts, and therefore make decisions based on their fictional intelligence. 

Amber Nicole Thurman. 28 years old. 

A D&C. That's all it would have taken to save that young mother's life. A D&C. That's all it would have taken. A procedure that has been around for more than half a century. A procedure that has saved countless lives of uterus-bearing humans worldwide for decades. It needs to take place for different reasons, but, as we have watched this horror unfold at the hands of morons, it becomes abundantly clear that it needs to take place when MEDICAL PROFESSIONALS deem it necessary. Whenever, and under whatever circumstances they and their patients agree upon. 

The ONLY people who should have a say. Period. 

So, for all of the pro-life people... that pro part, it doesn't extend to the Mother? 

Most of us have lost people along the way we cared for deeply. Tragedy happens. We don't need to force it. We should be using every tool in our collective toolboxes to prevent every tragedy we can. It absolutely makes NO sense to have the ability, the science, the know-how, to stop this kind of heartbreak, and simply refuse to do so. 

What if...

What if a group of people decided that appendectomies were morally wrong. Then they pass legislation making it illegal for ANYONE to get one. 

What if another group decides that pacemakers are evil?

What if another group objects to chemotherapy on moral grounds?

What if the groups who feel that blood transfusions are morally wrong pass legislation to outlaw them for everyone?

Should any one group of people make blanket medical decisions for everyone because they don't agree with it? 

You don't want a D&C, don't have one. You don't want to pursue IVF treatments... don't. You don't want birth control, don't use it. You don't want an abortion? Don't have one. You don't want gender reassignment surgery? Don't get it. 

Nobody is trying to force you do any of these things!!!! Calm your ass down! We are not qualified to make those decisions for you! Right?! That would be ridiculous!

You have absolutely no business making any decisions about anyone else's health and/or body. Period. 

These same idiots push lies about immigrants, causing bomb threats and school closures. Forcing people to live in fear over a pile of BS. 

Terrorizing innocent people should never be a card in a political hand, let alone played, and with such gusto, no less. Then defending and doubling down on the lies to fan the flames. Having the hillbilly militia roam the streets with automatic weapons. Just how are sane, rational people supposed to feel about this?!

This same group of sub-zero intelligence continues to REFUSE to introduce any kind of common sense gun laws. Even on the heels of two completely off-the-charts unstable members of this same group, who obtained the guns legally mind you, trying to take shots at their candidate! Thoughts and prayers?

Question...

Why does your supposed devotion to protecting kids stop the second they are born?

You don't want to make sure they eat or have health care, or support their parents through trying to bring down housing and childcare costs. You don't want minimum wage to equal a living wage, but you also don't want social safety nets in place to fill in the gaps. You don't want to make sure kids can go to a doctor, get medicine, get help with mental health if they need it, go to a dentist, read classic literature, learn how to be critical thinkers, have music as part of their education... or eliminate the need for active shooter drills. 

So, now, this little six-year-old boy has to grow up without his Mommy. Her family has to go on without her. 

A completely unforced tragedy... there's no reason... and this is just the beginning... if they get their way. 

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