Person, Woman, Man, Camera, TV...

Hi!

Okay, a couple things.

First,  I'm having a seriously hard time keeping my smart ass in check after watching the Cheeto -in-chief brag about 'acing' the Montreal cognitive assessment test. 

Have you checked it out? I did. It's a one-page test. The last few questions that Trump wants you to believe were so difficult are literally this.

1. recognizing the fact that bananas and oranges are both fruit.

2. repeating 5 words you heard 5 minutes previous. (The whole test is designed to last approximately 10 minutes) 

3. knowing the date and where you are

Now, in at least one of the interviews where he tries to dazzle with his brilliance, he says the latter, and supposedly tougher recall question was 10, 15, 20, 25 minutes after he initially heard the words. As the whole test is designed to last 10 minutes for a reason, either the person who administered the test was giving him a ton of extra time to answer the questions, he has an incredibly poor sense of time, or he's just full of it. None of the options are great... for him.

Yes, as the number of cases of COVID in the United States surpasses 4 million, as the infection rate climbs, and deaths cross the threshold of 144,000, he's spending his time bragging about how brilliantly he can recognize camels and bananas.

Watching him struggle to pretend he cares is like watching a toddler do advanced calculus. 

Ok, second.

A shout out of absolute respect for Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez and the way she stood up for herself and all women, really, when she stood her ground on the Congress floor. She faced Tedd Yoho and explained in terms simple enough even the Republicans could understand, that calling her a 'fucking bitch' is not something she was just going to let slide.

I'm sorry if some are offended by the language but it is a direct quote from a long-time Congressman, sooooo...

In her speech, she explains how his words were not new. How almost every woman has been subjected to this kind of unfounded verbal assault at some point in her life. 

It's not new, but that doesn't make it acceptable.

Personally, I've dealt with it a ton.

One instance that sticks out in my memory...

Years ago, I worked for an auction company that routinely provided services to farmers that were selling their equipment and household items.

I was one of the first of a very few female bid catchers, and as such stood on the flatdeck trailer alongside the other bid catchers (both men) and the smaller items for sale. For those who have never been to an auction, the catchers are the ones who scan the crowd, practiced in noticing even the most subtle bidder's gesture. In a crowd of hundreds, you have to watch for every flick of a finger, wiggle of an eyebrow, etc. As things sold, whoever was holding the item up to be seen by the crowd would hand it to the winning bidder. 

After the sale of one the first items of the day, as I handed it down to the guy who bought it, he, in his best and loudest condescending voice asked me, "So what are you, the stripper?"

Of course, his remark caused some snickers and giggles from the guys around him. I held my composure and remained professional. 

But... for the rest of the day...

Every time he blinked, I caught it as a bid. Every time he swatted at a mosquito, it was a bid. Every time he scratched his nose... well, you get the point. Somehow, he managed to win the bid on every box of junk on the trailer. Each time I handed him yet another box of useless crap, I would ask, "Now do you know why I'm here?"

Five hours and hundreds of dollars later, I think he got the point.

Working in bars, I had a patron try and shove his tip down my shirt. After he was able to breathe again, he doubled the tip, apologized, promising never to that again to me or anyone else.

Working in restaurants, I had a customer try to reach his hand up my uniform skirt as I poured him coffee. After I swung the coffee pot near his face, he looked at me in shock. 

"You almost hit me with that!" 

"I know. Next time, I don't miss."

I've had a job where I was warned of a co-worker, "Watch out for that one, he's an ass grabber." Like it was something that a person just had to put up with.

I could go on, but at some point, it just gets ridiculous.

The most ridiculous part of it is I know every woman who reads this will have her own experiences of very similar things. I fought back so my daughters wouldn't have to, but here they are, having to.

Hopefully, in part, because of the AOC's of the world, my granddaughters won't have to be subjected to this, that is anything but new.

Hopefully.

What can we do? Don't let it slide.

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May we hold the gaze of those who want to de-humanize, demean, dismiss, make them face their words.

May we hold them accountable, let none of it slide, for to do so is a betrayal of our daughters' worth.

May we make them see the faces of their mothers, wives and daughters each time they choose to spew venom.

May we hold them accountable, all of them, for every drop, no matter if they walk in an Armani suit or Walmart denim.

May those who are still wearing the Cheeto covered blinders, lift them so they can see.

May they see they deserve so much more than, person, woman, man, camera, tv.

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For that summer read...

https://www.amazon.ca/Once-Broken-Margy-Reid-ebook/dp/B071HTFTX6/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=once+broken&qid=1595624664&sr=8-1

Karen, Just Explain Why...

Hi.

Sooooooo, how's your summer going? Are you doing okay?

With all that is going on, what with the Whitehouse occupant taking time between golf games to ramble on about showers and dishwashers, to take bean selfies, and threaten schools. Then there's the strange repulsion some folks are experiencing. It's a repulsion of protecting themselves and others by simply by wearing a piece of harmless cloth. That's just weird.  Aaaaaand as this is all going on, there is the added terror of the horrifically bizarre militia crap going on in Portland. That, my friends, is scary as hell. Aaaaaand then there is this. Not as much of a threat to society, but, still...

The 'Karen'.

These women, although I've seen some evidence of 'Darrens' as well, have somehow indoctrinated themselves as overseers of all things.

Sadly there is usually a racist undertone, but, not always.

They seem to believe that they have every right to ask for, and expect from complete strangers, copious amounts of personal information. This includes where they were born, where they currently live, why they are walking, why they feel the need to be places, talk to people, or do things. 

It seems their go-to move when these complete strangers have the audacity to refuse to provide requested information, is to call 911. 

911.

Most of these women seem to be middle-aged white women.

I'm 54, so white I'm basically translucent, and I don't' get it either.

My first question, of course, is why?

Just.....why?

Calling the police under the guise of an emergency because you don't recognize someone who is walking in your neighbourhood, or because kids are playing, or someone wouldn't give you their address is so insanely ludicrous. 

Why?

Police will come with little to no information as to what is actually going on. They will come armed and believing the information from the call, which, 99.9% of the time carries all the truth of one of...well, anything coming out of Trump's mouth.

Why and how did you come to believe that you have been instilled with the right to bend the behaviors of, and/or extract information from people? From people who don't know you from a hole in the ground, for crying out loud?

Why does it seem absolutely impossible for you to mind your own damn business?

Just, why?

You will save yourself a lot of frustration and disappointment if you just come to this conclusion right now. 

Strangers will never ever owe it to you to bend to your bidding, They owe you exactly ZERO explanation. Oh, and, your comfort level is no more important than anyone else's. So, yeah. Just get over yourself, okay?

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Well, folks, hate to ramble and run, but after four days straight of working 17+ hour days working with my hubby at our shop, where every day is leg day, three no-fun-at-all solo road trips through full-blown construction season, and a four day sleep total of about 5 hours, I've got to get to bed.

Take care of yourselves, and those around you, and for God's sake, Karen, if you can hear me, just... well, just stop it. You're making us look bad.

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May you wear a mask when distancing isn't possible, avoid large gatherings, and wash your hands. It really is that simple.

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www.margyreidbooks.com 

Same Sky, Different Day...

Hi!

So, there are a few things I'm having a bit of trouble wrapping my head around.

Pro-Trump people are out there having tantrums about wearing masks, having tantrums about statues, having tantrums about Black Lives Matter, calling the police on people for sitting in cars in front of their own homes, for walking by their house, for the weirdest damn things.

But...

If the "it's my body" is the argument you want to use for not wearing a mask because you feel it interferes with your freedom of choice, as you have to wear it for the hour or so it takes you to do your shopping, then how can you be soooooo against choice when it comes to women and THEIR choices about their own bodies and being pregnant for 40 weeks. I guarantee her decision to not have a baby will affect others much less than you not wearing a mask.

If you are using the argument about keeping statues and monuments that glorify people who actually fought AGAINST your United States in the civil war as a preservation of history, you should probably study more thoroughly your history. You should then strive to replace the existing statues and monuments with ones to honour more of the people who actually deserve it. If your going to fight this hard to preserve history, it should, at least, be accurate.

If, and it's a big if, ALL lives matter, shouldn't that include the young lives of colour that are being held in cages for no reason that makes any sense? Shouldn't that include the kids you are about to force back to school before the science shows that it's safe to do so? Shouldn't it include all of the people that are bound to get infected because woefully and willfully ignorant people gleefully ignore experienced and qualified scientists and doctors and choose, instead, to follow the advice of a guy who hasn't mastered the workings of an umbrella?

Last but not least, as a middle-aged white woman I'm begging, PLEASE stop. Stop calling the police and/or threatening to call the police for stupid non-reasons. Stop interfering in other peoples' lives! Yes, I am addressing the 'Karens' of the universe.

Just stop. It's never okay. People DO NOT need your permission to live their lives. They DO NOT need your permission to ride their bikes, skateboards, or motorcycles. They DO NOT have to give you a reason for being ANYWHERE. They DO NOT have to give you their names, their itineraries, their addresses, or anything else. They DO NOT have to prove to you that they didn't steal something by showing you a receipt. They DO NOT have to feed your ego by complying with whatever ludicrous, imagined, infraction you think they have committed. The DO NOT owe it to you to let you have your way.

They DO NOT owe you an explanation for ANYTHING! Nobody does! It's time to get over yourself and just stop it.

If you are threatened at the thought of true equality, it may be time to ask yourself why. Whether it's gender, race, or LGBTQ+, if the thought of all people being unconditionally equal makes you uncomfortable, it's time to rethink how you walk through the world. 

We are at the precipice of loooong overdue change. I can't wait to see what it looks like on the other side.

Yes, we all live under the same sky, but, my friends, it is indeed, a different day.

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May science and equality propel humankind to the other side of this storm.

May we find our way through this darkness and be, once again, where it's warm.

May those who reject reality learn to embrace what actually is.

May those neck-deep in reality, find a way through this muck triumphant, find bliss.

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To order books please visit:

www.margyreidbooks.com 

Endless Horizons...

Hi!

Endless horizons.

For some, the thought of not being able to see what's on the other side, the unpredictability, the unknown, all of it is terrifying. It can be hard not to worry about what you can't know.

For others, the same thoughts bring on nothing but excitement for unknown adventures. Thrilled by not knowing what comes next.

For most, I think, it's probably a mixed bag. 

The world we are currently living in is basically a perpetual trigger for anxiety. Those who suffer from this sometimes debilitating affliction during the best of times are guaranteed to be struggling right now. 

Even for those thrilled by the unknown have their limits.

In the midst of all of the turmoil, we need to take a few steps back and remember that even when surrounded by upheaval, we can find peace.

Peace.

We have to remind ourselves that it's still okay to laugh, it's still okay to be goofy, it's still okay to sit in the sun with an ice-cold beverage of your choice, crank some tunes and breathe. 

Peace.

We have to remind ourselves that everything is temporary. This too shall pass. Every cloud has a silver lining. Insert all optimistic cliches here. Thing is, cliches become cliches for a reason.

Peace.

Even if it's only for a few minutes, a few seconds. Even if you are armpit deep. Even if your world has turned to complete crap. Even if your kids are driving you nuts, your dust bunnies are planning a revolution, and your laundry monster is threatening world domination. Even if, and maybe, especially when. 

Peace.

If you don't feel you can, if a smile seems miles out of reach. If everything just feels like it's too much, too heavy, hold on. Don't give up. Stay. Please reach out. To someone, to anyone. The world is a brighter place because of you. The light you shine is important and uniquely yours. Things will get better, even if it's impossible to see right now through the weighted darkness, The sun will break through. It can't do anything else. Just know you are not alone, no matter how much it may feel that way right now. Keep reaching out until you find a hand reaching back. It may take a few tries, but it will be there. 

Peace.

If you are finding that you are able to find your smile without herculean effort, try not to keep it to yourself. If kind words come, set them free unto the world so they might land on the souls that need them. The world needs the lighthearted to lighten hearts other than their own. Frivolity is not frivolous, we need it as much as we need to breathe.

Peace. 

That is what I believe is on the horizon. Peace. A gentler world that has had its eyes opened to what really matters. A world that finds itself willing to finally take real steps towards equality. A world that shows more respect for the people who really are the ones who make our society function. A world that has learned its lesson about listening to science. A humanity that shows more care. 

On a more personal note.

This weekend, my hubby and I will celebrate our 33rd wedding anniversary. We've been together 35. I feel lucky every single day that I have him in my life. We have been through a lot. We have had incredible highs and devastating lows. 

We have always chosen roads less traveled, living a pretty unconventional life. Neither of us does well with fitting into neat little boxes. We make decisions based on what fits rather than what is expected. It doesn't always turn out the way you think, but that, my friends, is half the fun. 

He is my best friend. He's my rock when I need solid ground and my wings when I need to fly. He's been the source of my laughter, the reason for my tears, and can still make my heart flutter with a single look. He's Daddy to our children and Grandpa to theirs. He's a kind and gentle soul, the love of my life, my everything.

Happy Anniversary, my Honey. Here's to the next 33!

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Until next time...

May you share what you can, a smile, a kind word, time or even money.

May you see the bitter in the world is overpowered by the honey.

May you find some peace in whatever form that takes.

May you find it in your workout, in a park, at one of your favourite lakes.

May you, if you need to, reach out for understanding, for compassion, for a caring hand.

May you, if you can, provide hope, be the hand to help others back to their feet, help them stand.

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www.margyreidbooks.com