Hugs Are Magic...

 

Hi! 

"Take care of yourself."

 

Something we say. Kind of like the "How are you?" "Fine, thanks, and you?" thing. 

But, what does it actually mean?

There are those who do everything 'right'. They never drink, never smoke, eat healthily, exercise regularly, and still, and yet, they still end up with illnesses that carry them away. 

There are those who seemingly live without any of these restrictions, these boundaries, these rules, who live active lives well into their golden years. 

Then, there are the rest of us. 

We live imperfect lives, we develop habits that aren't necessarily conducive to encouraging longevity, crossing our fingers that none of them come back to bite us later on. Some of these habits take deep root, others, not so much. We eat healthily, at least some of the time, we have the odd drink, here and there, we exercise on purpose once in a while, but get most of our activity through our day-to-day. 

Stuff can happen to anyone. And it does.

So, taking care of ourselves. What does it mean?

I am far from any kind of expert on the subject, but here's what I think.

We do our best.

What is supposed to be good for us seems to change with every study that comes down the pike. Dairy is good for you, until it's not. Eggs are good for you, then they're not, then they are again. Drink coffee, don't drink coffee. Walking is better than running, or maybe it's the other way around. 

There are a bunch of companies out there selling their potions, their fitness equipment, their high protein, low fructose, gluten-free diet, and fitness flavours of the week. 

Personally, I don't think human evolution works at a pace that warrants all of the lightning round changes. It's impossible to keep up. So, I don't.

No sugar, no gluten, no dairy, high protein, low carb, impossible meat, counting calories, counting steps, tracking micro things... 

While they continue to figure out how to use our natural fear of aging, and watching our bodies do the same, the healthiest thing about them is the profit they turn by stoking our fear of the inevitable.

The truth is this. We all die.

We start to die the minute we are born. 

Taking care of ourselves is broader, deeper, and wider than simply watching what we eat and going for a walk.

Taking care of ourselves means nourishing relationships, feeding them with laughter and conversations about everything and nothing all at once. It means doing what we can to stay on the planet to enjoy those relationships for as long as we can, leaving room for a little cake and ice cream. 

It means taking time to do nothing. Without guilt. We have it drilled into us from the time we start school that doing nothing is a bad thing. I don't think it is.

We can't just be here, on this planet, to work. To work to buy stuff, buy places to put that stuff, fill it, then have to buy bigger places to hold more stuff, only to die and leave behind a big pile of stuff for our loved ones to deal with. 

We can't. That can't be all there is to it. 

When you stop to think about the legacy... the mark you want to leave on the world when you leave it, what does it look like? 

Everyone will have a different answer, as well they should. 

Whatever your answer, let your actions drive you in that direction. 

So, eat the cake. Maybe not every day, but have some.

Listen to your body before it hits you over the head with something big. Listen to the little things.

Laughter is better for you than any flavour of the week.

Our only true legacy lies in the memories we create with the loved ones we will inevitably leave behind. 

Oh yeah, and... Hugs are magic. 

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May we all take a look at what hits hardest when we allow memories of lost loved ones flood in.

May we do our best to leave behind a legacy of happy tears.

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Time To Lighten Up!

 

Hi!

Winter feels....heavy. It's dark, it's cold, it seems endless. Hell, even the eggs becoming pancakes look like they've hit their limit!

The world, over the past several years, has felt heavy. I mean, a world-altering Pandemic, the way different countries responded very differently. Hell, different regions of countries couldn't even get on the same page as each other on how to handle things. 

Everybody became pissed. Over everything. Too many rules, not enough rules, the chaos that misinformation threw into an already volatile situation. The curtain of humanity was pulled back revealing an ugliness we always feared lurked in the shadows.

Blatant disregard for the feelings of others. Things like empathy and sympathy were suddenly looked at as weaknesses instead of the strengths they are.

So, I, for one think it's time.

Time to lighten up!

We are social animals and have been separated by necessity and anxiety long enough. We can get the best of our humanity back. We can make replacing karenicity with kindness the new trend. We can remind ourselves about just how far the tiniest bit of common courtesy can go. 

We've been isolated for far too long. Yes, it's been a while since we've had to physically be as separate from one another as we were during the worst of it, but we are definitely still feeling the aftershocks.

There were babies born that are only now getting any real taste of life out in the world, where more than just a few people congregate. They are finally experiencing faces outside of their families, and they aren't on a screen!

There were toddlers about to start preschool that weren't able to dip those tiny, adorable toes in the social pool like they otherwise would have. 

There are teenagers who missed precious months developing incredibly important social skills. Interacting with peers, and teachers in real life, instead of over zoom. Learning how to read a room, understanding social cues, the importance of making appropriate eye contact, how to greet people with confidence but not arrogance. You know, life skills. 

Yes, it's been a beat since we've had to physically isolate, but as far as I can tell, we are far from recovering from the emotional isolation. 

So, let's give each other some slack, shall we?

From toddlers to teenagers to the rest of us. So many of us are very likely still feeling weird in crowded spaces, and that's okay. Lots are likely fine with it, and that's okay too. Some may choose to continue to wear masks, which, but the way, needs no response from anyone... really, it doesn't. Some may feel uneasy as they head back into their "normal" work routine, while others have simply chosen different ways to make a living.

For some, the past few years was simply a chaotic blip. To others, it has been life-altering, in horrific ways. 

You know the saying, 'we are all in the same boat'? Well, we weren't. In the same storm, yes, but we all weathered it in vastly different boats. Some had yachts while others had nothing more than a floating door, and, still others, didn't even have that. 

So, slack, compassion, whatever you feel comfortable calling, it's time to get it trending.

Let's flood the planet with kindness!

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May all things that bring you joy come to you in abundance. You deserve it. 

Let's Talk... Again... Still... Always...

 

Hi!

Frost tickles, then clings to the branches. Fog ushers in the change in temperature, warmer now, with the promise, or more accurately, threat, of colder days to come.

The beauty is thrust upon us, a cocoon that happens when the clouds kiss the ground, a diamond mist, at once, gorgeous and deadly, for what hugs you, also hinders your sight.

A sparkling blindfold adding danger, limiting vision, deadening sound. A stunning blanket bringing comfort and anxiety in almost equal measure.

Thankfully there is an inevitable break. The sun pierces, once again welcomed by the horizon, its light lifting what once seemed too heavy to move.

We don't control the mist, nor the light. We can only accept, adjust, take the care needed to keep us safe until the light returns.

And it does return. Always. 

This week, the 25th will mark a day in Canada. Let's Talk.

It's all about bringing forth the importance of mental health and the how the stigma attached needs to be demolished.

It's about having the conversations. They can be difficult for the speaker and listener alike. They can be difficult. No, they are difficult. It's never easy to hear, and I mean really hear, our loved ones describe the darkness they struggle with. It's hard to listen to the fight it takes to simply not get swallowed up, imprisoned, and paralyzed by it. 

It's hard feeling helpless.

We can't always know the right thing to say or do. 

All we know is we love you. You matter. You are worth every and all conversations. We need you here. It would break us if you weren't. We want to help, even if all that means, is listening.

The sun will once again come through, kissing your cheeks, lifting your soul.

The heavy blanket, deceitfully beautiful, disguised as comfort, will once again become the carpet of diamonds on which your tread.

Give us your burden, for it was never meant for you to carry alone. 

Let's Talk... Again...Still...Always.

There is no conversation too hard, too obscure, too late at night, too dark, or too much. 

You matter. 

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May you find a gentle shoulder upon which to share your burden. 

Different Roads, Different Days, At Different Times, In Different Directions...

Hi!

Different roads, different days, at different times, in different directions. 

You never have to look too far to witness nature's scenescape simply, and beautifully proving how, though things seem to remain stagnant, they are really changing at lightning speed. 

We tend to fall into the hamster wheel willingly, almost craving its monotony. It's safe, it's familiar, we understand it, we recognize it on many different levels. It's home, whether we are aware of it consciously or not. 

Time passes whether we are paying attention or not. Seconds become minutes, become hours, become days, become weeks, become months, become years, become decades...

Then, we sit and ponder where the time went. Consistently surprised by the speed at which it passes. 

We all do it.

For me, it begs the question... why?

Why does it seem to be our nature to become a spectator in our own lives only to lament about being a spectator in our own lives? And somehow surprised that it happened?

It seems like a fixable problem, if it actually qualifies as a problem. 

If it does, in fact, qualify as a problem some solutions might be...

Go somewhere you've never been at least once a year. (It doesn't need to require a plane... or a vehicle of any kind, really)

Do something you've never done before at least once a month.

Try a new food at least once a week.

Do things that scare you on some level, in some way, even if, or maybe especially if you are unsure of why it scares you. The scare needn't be huge, it just needs to be enough to speed o]up your heart rate a bit, and just maybe a bit of flop-sweat. 

Different roads, different days, at different times, in different directions. 

Take them all. 

With the wonder and confidence of a toddler in a superhero costume and new light-up runners, embrace, chase, and face all of them. 

The view from the hamster wheel is so small, so limited, so void of the vibrancy that comes from stepping off. The view from the hamster wheel can become too comfortable, limiting us, pulling us from the field of play, and seating us in the nosebleed section. 

Who decided that life shouldn't be filled with silliness, laughter, empathy, and joy?

I don't have any proof... but it was probably the hamster. 

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May you find the want to, to try new things.

May you feel free to paint, to sculpt, to write, to sing.

May you go places you never thought you would.

May to experience and explore like you never thought you could. 

May you discover the value of stepping away from the wheel.

May you embrace the lightness it will inevitably make you feel. 

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Just Because You Always Have, Doesn't Mean You Always Have To...

 

Hi!

So, here we are. Just past the beginning. Stepped to, and ready to dive from the precipice. The first few strides through the threshold have been taken, the first few words of the new chapter written.

Now what?

What will you be diving into? Where will your strides take you? What kind of story will you write?

The beauty of it is you get to choose. You.

So many of the things that tend to hold us back, that stop us short, that keep us from... whatever it is, are self-inflicted. Self-imposed imaginary rules tethering us, keeping us from taking full flight.

We, as humans, are creatures of habit. We tend to do things because we've always done them, or that's how they've always been done. 

We tend to do what's expected.

It's comfortable. Life can be hard, and sometimes doing what's comfortable works for us.

But what if it stops working? What if what's expected, what if the way we've always done things doesn't feel right anymore?

Does that mean we have to start over? Completely flip our worlds upside down? 

Personally, I don't think so. I think small changes can make big differences.

Something as small as a new haircut can be enough. Something as big as moving to a new country might be what's necessary. Most likely it will be something in between.

As this new chapter gets underway, it's time to reread the previous one, and decide what direction this next one might take. Will it be a chapter of action and adventure, will it be quiet and healing, or will it be so funny it makes you pee a little? 

The things that didn't contribute to your happiness last year will need adjustment or elimination. If not the whole thing, the pieces that are draining your joy, for sure. 

Just because you always have, doesn't mean you always have to.

The things that boosted you, made you smile, brought you joy, keep those, for sure, just make them bigger. 

We convince ourselves of things all the time, both good and bad. We convince ourselves that success has a very narrow definition. We convince ourselves that the path to that narrow definition is narrower yet. We convince ourselves that a stamp of approval from family, friends, and even strangers has merit of some kind. We convince ourselves that we don't really deserve peace, joy, and ease. We convince ourselves that life is somehow supposed to be hard and that's just the way it is. 

Let's convince ourselves that being happy and peaceful IS success, that we deserve it, that it doesn't require permission or approval. Let's convince ourselves that the paths we wouldn't dare travel are exactly the paths others are meant to take. 

Let's not only think outside the box. Let's just get rid of the boxes altogether, shall we? 

Boxes are traps. Period. Walk free. Sing free. Write free. Be free. 

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May every step you take into this next chapter have within it, a little skip.

May we all move forward with intention, with purpose, little steps, or an entire flip.

May your actions march you ever closer to the life you truly, deeply crave.

May you find the strength to make the changes you need to to be happy, be brave.

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A Life Bigger, Wider, Broader, Deeper...

 Hi! 

And just like that, we are on the threshold of another new year. Another chance to live the lives we were meant to live. Another chance to marry our actions to our dreams. Another chance to look at our lives, and make decisions to improve them. 

This time of year tends to make a lot of us reflective. Which is a good thing, I think We are here to learn things, and you can't do that if you just bumble through life without thought. 

Personally, I strive to live a life that goes beyond just living on the surface. Yes, day-to-day mechanics of life happen, at least to a certain extent, on auto-pilot. I won't deny that. I do, though, on a regular basis, take a step back and take a deeper dive. 

I can't help but believe that life should be bigger, wider, broader and deeper than making money, paying bills, and chasing errands. It has to. 

It has to be bigger than keeping score of who has the biggest, best and fanciest. 

It has to be wider than our bubbles of comfort.

It has to be broader than the borders that surround us.

It has to be deeper than worrying about mortgages, meetings, and buying groceries. 

It has to. 

We all know this on some level, but reminders never hurt. I know I need them fairly often.

Tomorrow is never promised, which makes each day precious. We should always do our best to treat it as such. 

We can't grow without some level of discomfort.

Kindness isn't an act, it's a choice we make every day. 

Put the majority of your energy into the things that light you up, things that feed your soul.

Let go. Let go of all the things that weigh you down. You don't need permission from anyone but yourself.

Forgiveness is not for those who have wronged you, it's the antidote to the poisons they left within you. 

Treat yourself with the same kindness, compassion, and understanding you give your friends. 

It's okay to take a beat when you need to, and breathe. 

Busy should never be the goal. 

The way you are perceived by others is irrelevant. Be guided by your heart, your conscience. Making decisions based on the fear of others' opinions can do nothing but lead to a path to discontent. 

So as this year winds down. look back, reflect, hold on to the good parts, and let the rest go.

Cherish the now, be hopeful, be positive, be brave, be kind, and strive to be here to treasure each tomorrow with health and happiness.  

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Happy New Year!

May the upcoming year bring you nothing but happiness and laughter.

May any obstacles be tiny, nothing but a worn-down speed bump, barely noticeable in this new chapter.

May your every dream come true, if not in the way you envisioned, in a way simply too magical for you to conceive. 

May you trust that good things can happen, they do every day, we just need to pay attention and believe. 

May you live your life, steering toward joy, aiming at happiness, spewing dust into the face of fear.

May you feed what lights you up, nourish your peace, living an incredible New Year!

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Happy Holidays!

 

Hi! This is going to be a bit short and sweet.

Short, because gratefully, we have our whole crew landing under our roof in a couple of days, and I still have stuff to do.

Sweet, because there is nothing that makes life sweeter than them coming home.

As our kids get older, and their kids get older,  the amount of time we all spend under one roof diminishes. Naturally so. It just makes the times we are able to get together more meaningful. 

We know just how lucky we are. We are grateful.

So, when you celebrate this holiday season, no matter how, no matter why, no matter where, keep in your thoughts those who are spending this season in the dark, in the cold, in turmoil, alone. 

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Spending...

May you spend your time in such a way that looking back will make you smile.

May you treasure your time with loved ones, especially if you haven't seen them in a while.

May none of us take for granted our time together, our time alone, our time... period.

May we understand that to do so, by no means do we always need to be serious. 

May your laughter ring loud enough to lift the spirits of those who need it most.

May your every act of kindness ripple far, ripple wide, reaching both poles, each and every coast.