Next Step... Adulting

 

Hi!

Well folks, once again, it's that time of year.

Another group of kids privileged enough to live where education is available, even mandatory... where they don't have to worry about war in their back yard... You get what I mean... well, they get to graduate from high school, and are taking their first real steps into adulthood.

The majority of them have gotten to live the lives kids should get to live... being kids.

Does that mean they don't feel anxious about their future? Does it mean they aren't apprehensive about what comes next? 

No! Absolutely not! Within the next little while they will be walking into a world that feels both foreign and familiar. The literal world around them won't have physically changed much, but their role within it will.

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To those about to walk into adulthood.

Although your surroundings may not become completely different, your perspective will.

Here are a few things...

No matter how high your self esteem, no matter your level of confidence, you will come across something, or a few things that will test that to the core. Don't let it break you. It's okay to shake, just don't break.

The chances of you experiencing a shitty roommate are very close to 100%. Always get receipts for money going out. Paper trails are imperative. No matter how nice they seem, or how long you've been friends.

Toilet paper, tampons, food and utilities are way more expensive than you realize. And, yes, garbage cans and light fixtures are not self-cleaning. 

Put due dates for bills you need to pay into your calendar on repeat, with reminders a few days beforehand. Brain farts are more common than you think, especially when you are first starting out. It's important. "I forgot" won't fix late fees or keep services from being cut off. Stamping "bad risk" on your record can take years to erase. Landlords and mortgage brokers pay attention to all of that... so should you.

Accepting financial help is okay... just don't make a habit of it. Accept... don't Expect. Besides, there are few things more satisfying than the ability to pay your own way in life. 

Be resourceful. If you need something, or want something bad enough, there is always a way. Legally, of course. Never let getting knocked down keep you down. Take the hit, take a step back, take a breath, get your feet under you, and get a 360° look at the situation. A path forward always exists. Sometimes, you just have dig deep to find it. 

Not everyone grows up in an encouraging environment. Leave that behind. You know who you are. Even if it's buried deep, you know what you are capable of. Never let the nagging and dragging down of the words they tried to use as weapons against your self-worth make you doubt that. Use those words, their words, instead, as fuel to brighten your shine to levels that will kill every shade they threw.

The best thing about this next part is that you are finally in charge of your life. The scariest thing about this next part is that you are finally in charge of your life. From here on in, you have to own your choices. The good news is, there are very few choices in life that are fatal or impossible to recover from. 

Speaking of choices, don't make them out of fear. When faced with a big decision, walk yourself through the worst case scenario. If you can be okay with whatever that is, there is no reason not to do it. 

Life is not perfect. It resembles instagram, not even a little bit. You are going to screw things up for yourself now and then. Shit storms are going to happen through no fault of your own. Life is messy, can feel overwhelming, and can be just plain hard. It's all part of the ride. But.... there are always good things on the other side. Every experience, good or bad, shows you a little more of who you are, and who you are meant to become. 

That, by the way, never stops. None of us have been where we are at this very moment, before this very moment. I have never been the version of me that I am today before today. Nobody is. Be open, stay willing to learn from every experience.

You only get one chance at life. You might as well enjoy it. 

Adulting is hard.... but it also can be fucking fantastic! Soak it up!

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May you spread your wings and fly to heights that only lived in your dreams.

May you understand that even when things are at their worst, it's never as dark as it seems.

May you find joy, have something to laugh at every day.

May you look at your future in wonder, live each and every moment, letting nothing get in your way.

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